Equal Rights For ALL Women! (Even ones we want to be INVISIBLE!)

From the first moment my wife discovered she had breast cancer, there was a deafening silence from the men I know. Even ones whose wives, mothers or girlfriends had breast cancer seemed to have received a gag order from some Central Cancer Command and did little more than mumble about the experience. Not one to shut up for any known reason, I started this blog.

 Earlier this week my wife, who is also a cancer survivor and who had a double mastectomy, told me about a woman who had also survived breast cancer and who requested permission to swim at a Seattle, WA pool topless. (http://www.vancouversun.com/health/Double+mastectomy+cancer+survivor+gets+swim+topless/6830468/story.html)

At first the city turned her down, citing a pool rule. When she explained her situation – they made an exception, but only for her. Any other woman who had survived cancer and a double mastectomy, and who would want to swim topless in order to be comfortable while exercising, would have to go beg for the permission of Seattle Parks and Recreation Superintendent Christopher Williams. (Boy could I say something about THAT…) I am quite sure that my wife would be too shy to do that and would put up with the pain that accompanies wearing virtually ANY clothing over healed mastectomy incisions!

I find it ironic and irritating that in a society that openly promotes, celebrates, encourages and markets the ritualized exposing of women’s breasts (just not the nipple – but any other part of the gland is completely and enthusiastically endorse by the judicial system of the land (which, I could point out, is heavily male…)) would hassle this cancer survivor in ANY way!

Maybe this is just part of the Post-Cancer Crash, but maybe it’s not. Maybe it’s righteous indignation that our society is set up for the “well” and while happy to make “exceptions” (for veterans, women, people with physical and mental handicaps, and small children), would just as soon carry on business as usual, excluding those who do not meet the requirements of the Real Competitors and who may have suffered in any way that would leave them (in the opinion of the Real Competitors) weak and unworthy and who have been FORCED to make concessions…

Ugh.

This whole incident leaves me feeling violated and disgusted – because, if you must know the truth, I am one of the Real Competitors and have been all my life. (Well, maybe not a REAL Real Competitors, I am, after all, only a teacher and not in Business (omar, sharif. omar, sharif.)) This past year has continually opened my eyes, challenge my preconceptions and prejudices, and forced me to reconstruct basic assumptions I’ve made all my life.

Image: http://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc6/c48.0.403.403/p403x403/168563_10150917738404091_1179796902_n.jpg