GUY’S GOTTA TALK ABOUT #23…“F***” Cancer

From the first moment my wife discovered she had breast cancer, there was a deafening silence from the men I know. Even ones whose wives, mothers or girlfriends had breast cancer seemed to have received a gag order from some Central Cancer Command and did little more than mumble about the experience. Not one to shut up for any known reason, I started this blog…

I have never counted myself among the billions on Earth whom I consider “casual cussers”.

I work in a large, semi-urban public high school and teenagers – primarily because they believe that cursing/vulgarities/taking-God’s-name-in-vain all make them look adult; which they believe because adults use the words and typically children don’t (you don’t see a competition on TV for little kids cussing, do you?).

My definition of “casual cussers” are those who use “the ‘f’ word every other word”, like Eddie Murphy does in "Beverly Hills Cop". Like lots of my teenagers do. (Not all of them! I’m not saying that.) What I am saying is that we live in a culture where most cuss words have lost their shock value and consistently and without pause, hang in the air of most of the places we live, work, and go to school.

I grew up with “casual cussers” so, because I was a rebellious teen who wasn’t particularly brave, I made it my mission in life to NOT be a “casual cusser”.

Of course, I know the words! I can even say them. But I use them in public ONLY on extremely rare occasions. Even privately, it takes a lot of pain or grief or anger to make me cuss. I use “casual cussing” in my writing because that’s the way people talk and if I had the teen characters of my new novel start off saying, “Hey, smart butt!” I would have lost credibility, realism (and probably the sale), all in one fell swoop.

All right, now for my point: after we found out that my wife’s best friend of 42 years discovered that she has breast cancer, I am considering buying this shirt and wearing it to the upcoming RELAY FOR LIFE I will be walking in this spring:

http://i3.cpcache.com/product/199885531/fuck_cancer_tshirt.jpg?height=300&width=300

There are other, less offensive shirts that get the exact same message across, but why bother? I think that wearing this would express my clear and present feelings – and I should add, that my feelings are most definitely NOT casual.

Image [top]: http://wrex.images.worldnow.com/images/23784252_SA.jpg

ENCORE # 33! – A Friend Scare, The Minnesota State Fair, The One Year Visit and People Not As On-Top-Of-Things As They Might Be…

From the first moment my wife discovered she had breast cancer, there was a deafening silence from the men I know. Even ones whose wives, mothers or girlfriends had breast cancer seemed to have received a gag order from some Central Cancer Command and did little more than mumble about the experience. Not one to shut up for any known reason, I started this blog…That was four years ago – as time passed, people searching for answers stumbled across my blog and checked out what I had to say. The following entry appeared in September of 2012.

A good friend of mine, a colleague at work, had a scare four days ago. In for a regular checkup and knowing she’s been cancer free for a bit over two years, she posted on FB that she was going back in for some more tests and a biopsy. The post read, “hoping for the word ‘benign’ tomorrow (had my mammogram today)...and biopsies are not pleasant (my 4th). I knew what was about to happen, when they brought me to the ‘fun room’ after taking 2 additional pics”

Praise God, she DID hear the words benign the next day. I hugged her so hard, she had to say, “Watch out for the boob!”

Apologizing profusely, I replied, “I just couldn’t help it! Sorry! I’m so...so...thrilled for you!”

What I meant, paradoxically, was, “I am so relieved for ME.”

Once again, this brought back to mind the fact that there is such a thing as aggressive cancer. That successful treatments do NOT always beat the monster to death, and we STILL need a cure. That’s what I’ll be riding for next year. That’s what I pray for every time I lift my eyes and heart up to the Lord.

The next event that day was OUR visit to the oncologist. I went with, but didn’t go in with my wife. Not for any more profound reason than that I didn’t want to get in the way. She came out after an hour or so smiling peacefully. “The doctor said there’s virtually no scar tissue. He asked me if I remembered the chemo.” My wife’s smile turned from peaceful to ironic with a few muscle movements as she said, “Oh, yes. I do. Every moment of it.” How can the Human face be so expressive, going from peace to irony with tiny twitches of electrical impulse? I don’t know, but it happens. She added a moment later, “He said he’d have been surprised if anything came back. The treatment was one of the most aggressive he’s ever done.”

*sigh*

We can be a peace for a bit more, now. Yet I’ll never forget the terror of last year; nor the spectre of possibilities in the future. I’ll deal. I can’t get used to it, but I’ll deal. “Faith. Hope. Love. These three; but the greatest of these is love.” (I Corinthians 13:13) That one I can do best after 25 years of marriage – that one has not dimmed, rather it’s grown stronger. That I can do...

I was at the Minnesota State Fair right after the appointment. In the Health Building, I wandered past the Caringbridge stand and stopped to tell them how grateful I am for their ministry/work/whatever. They asked if I wanted to have my picture taken and (of course!) I said, “Sure.” They said that if I tag it and get other people to tag me, a company that makes cards will donate a dollar for each tag, up to $2000! So, if you follow this link, you can tag me (I think…I don’t entirely get this FB tagging thing…) https://www.facebook.com/#!/photo.php?fbid=10152099135520241&set=a.10152094718910241.903860.86180025240&type=1&theater

As to people not doing exactly what they’re supposed to do? My wife was supposed to have a compression sleeve, had gotten the measurements taken and was assured the sleeve and hand would arrive soon by the Nurse Practitioner. Three weeks later, she had tried calling person; tried emailing the person – and was told the NP had no recollection of have done the measurements and couldn’t remember my wife. Grrrr….and what was she supposed to do about THAT? Lymphedema is serious business! How could someone “oops, I forgot” and then lie about it? I’m reasonably certain my wife wouldn’t LIE about someone measuring her arm!

A second NP did the work as well as noting that she had some lymphedema around the upper abdomen as well and gave my wife a compression bra as well! OK – now things are moving.

The lesson here?

YOU ARE YOUR OWN BEST ADVOCATE! Stay on top of everything and question everything – you don’t have to be mean about it, but this is serious stuff here! You can ask questions politely, just like your parents (and kindergarten teacher and middle school teacher and high school teacher…) taught you to do. But ASK!

Image: https://c2.staticflickr.com/6/5527/10893068965_1d328e8f71_b.jpg

BREAST CANCER RESEARCH RIGHT NOW! #43 : SHARKS DON’T GET CANCER!!! *Lie*

From the first moment my wife discovered she had breast cancer, there was a deafening silence from the men I know. Even ones whose wives, mothers or girlfriends had breast cancer seemed to have received a gag order from some Central Cancer Command and did little more than mumble about the experience. Not one to shut up for any known reason, I started this blog…

Every month, I’ll be highlighting breast cancer research that is going on RIGHT NOW! Harvested from different websites, journals and podcasts, I’ll translate them into understandable English and share them with you. Today: http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/sharks-do-get-cancer-tumor-found-great-white/, http://qz.com/523764/these-two-cancer-resisting-animals-offer-hope-for-a-human-cure/

Cancer.

I hate that word.

Why can’t we just get the secret of sharks, because as everyone knows, sharks don’t get cancer!

Unfortunately, that’s a lie...following the link above will give you a look at a truly gross picture that proves, once and for all that sharks DO get cancer! So stop spreading the fable!

On the other hand, ARE there living things that don’t experience the uncontrolled growth of cells?

As far as we can tell, yes. They are NOT as horrifyingly threatening as the creature that bears razor-sharp teeth and was immortalized by a musical bar containing “a simple alternating pattern of two notes—variously identified as E and F or F and F sharp”. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jaws_(soundtrack))

According to the second article, while elephants DO get cancer, the rate is remarkably less that Humans: “only 5% of elephants die of cancer in comparison to more than 20% humans”, this despite the fact that there are more cells in an elephant to GET cancer with!

The other animal that doesn’t get cancer is the…(pause for effect) naked mole rat.

Ewwww…

However, “as far as we know, [these animals] never develop cancer. Even if researchers try to induce cancer through artificial means.” The reason appears to be that there’s a substance called hyaluronan between rat cells. It’s a polymer, a long string of natural sugars that both makes the cells stronger as well as prevents the wild overgrowing of cells that we call cancer.

The thing is, is that Humans DO have hyaluronan, but it’s used for different things like balancing the exchange of water and plasma in the bloodstream, it may be a factor in cell division (aka mitosis), and cell movement. It also seems to play a role in deciding what kind of cell will grow from a basic type – muscle, nerve, liver, etc. It’s recognized as having the ability to protect cells and as such, it is used in eye surgery. Even so, it ALSO appears that conversely to what it does in the naked mole rat, hyaluronan that accumulates in between cells can cause them to malfunction.

Complex reactions that we don’t quite understand yet – but…but…but… “Rochelle Buffenstein, a physiologist at the University of Texas Health Science Center [said], ‘As we learn more about these cancer-resistant mechanisms that are effective and can be directly pertinent to humans, we may find new cancer prevention strategies.’”

Resources: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/1563592

Image: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/40/Naked_mole_rat.jpg